New Year's Resolutions

New Year, new…

No hang on, I'm still me. In the millisecond between 2015 and 2016 nothing really changed - a few cells may have died here and there, some other may have meiotically or mitotically divided, and some nerve impulses strained against the alcohol littering their phospholipid to get the image of the 00 on whatever London building it was to my conscious mind. Apart from that, the only thing that's changed is the date.

There was a soppy-woppy Facebook status at some point on the 31st of December 2015, however, which said something important, an artificial change. Nothing changes on new year's, nothing except that which we change for ourselves, and for what better reason than none at all? For what better reason than a number on a clock dragging humanity one year farther from our Palaeolithic caves and limping somewhat reluctantly into our past's future? Other than destiny, the future is just the change we make for ourselves.


So, I have decided to make a change. I feel as though for most of my life I haven't been putting as much effort in as I could have. Staring up at the mouth-watering cliff-climb that is the rest of your life spread out in front of you as a child, it can seem difficult to pick that one thing that will define you and your experience of the adult world. Now I am 19, and, like Mr Nobody, I have let too much pass me by contemplating with fear the infinity of possibility. Too long have I been playing zugzwang in a game of chess against the universe, and now I realise all it takes is a compulsion to want to make something, to want to contribute something with the limited universal resources allotted to a being. Consciousness is our experience, our window, and now I set out to widen mine.

I now have offers and interview from all 4 of the universities I applied to to study English and Drama, which has left me with the buzz of success and the excitement of what's to come. Thus begins the next step of my adventure.

All of life is a springboard, like Newton's giants, each new experience equipping you better to go off and do something new. In my earlier essay 'Reading and the Riptide' you witnessed the beginning of my discovery of the power of the book, now it has become fully realised. In the autumn 'term' of my gap year I read the Torah, the New Testament and the Qur'an and set myself a substantial reading list to skyrocket my awareness, but there are other mediums too that are worth exploring, so here I present my 2016 New Year's Resolutions:

In this, I hope to have got the widest possible array of experience of literature in as short a space a time as possible. True to these Resolutions, as we are now a full 11 days into the new year, I have finished a season of Peaky Blinders, Gotham, and have almost finished a season of Master of None, for which reviews are in process. I have been to see the new Star Wars and an essay on that should be coming soon, as well as other recent releases which I will also endeavour to write about. I'm trying to exercise my literate faculty as well as my literary - experiencing a lot of literature while producing a lot for myself. Though I have got back into the rhythm of doing the pyramid workout which I learnt from Hampshire Youth Theatre, I haven't yet watched the 1 Netflix film a week I promised, (I will, don't worry!), but this is because I've been reading fervently. Now I can proudly proclaim that I've finished the other 5 books on the previous leg of my reading list and have got out the subsequent block of 8 from the local library. I shall soon be writing a round-off article about what I learnt from reading those books, and with the next set I also endeavour to read a classic novel between each factual text for obvious reasons. Without further ado though, the next 8 books on my reading list:

My brother's phone has a great camera.

The books Barack Obama: The Making of a Man and Race of a Lifetime somewhat reflect my admiration for someone who I truly believe to be a great man, and then Hillary Clinton's Hard Choices I will read of someone who dealt with that great man, who made some lasting impact herself and dealt with some real challenges, and who may end up being one of the most powerful people in the world come the US election. By reading Hitler 1889-1936: Hubris I hope to come to understand what personal experiences could lead a human being to such depths of depravity and evil, to inform my understanding and writing of human characters, as well as understanding some contextual details about Europe in the period concerned. How Do We Fix This Mess? is about the 2008 recession and has a very long subtitle which I can't be bothered to write out in full. As I am not an economist myself but have interest in non-capitalist (socialistic) forms of government I feel that like Marx I need to spend some time to unpick for myself some of the flaws with the capitalist system before I can honestly criticise it. Linking to this somewhat is A Radical History of Britain, as I am beginning to understand the history of this nation to a greater extent following my latest read, and am interested in coming to understand the tradition of reformers and philanthropists who fought for the welfare state to which I owe my existence. Maajid Nawaz's Radical: My Journey From Islamist Extremism to a Democratic Awakening relates to this, but also to all of the investigation into religion which I have seen in the previous bulk of my reading in 2015. I am also interested in reading Nawaz's dialogue with Sam Harris - Islam and the Future of Tolerance - and feel like this will be a good prelude to understanding contextual factors which led to the writing of that book. Sex at Dawn is the oddball, but again it is something which relates to the deepest resonance of human spirit, and in my understanding of the human I feel this will contribute something, though I don't know as yet what.

So, that's all that summed up. As I've said I now have 2 places at university and 2 interviews for places at university, so I'm feeling pretty good about my prospects, and my expanded consciousness from the reading has given me a new sense of my capacity to succeed. I also now have a job which feels very good, to finally be working for my own keep, and intend in the new year to write essays whenever I finish a season of a TV show, watch a film or watch a play. I also want to write some new stories, maybe inspired by novels/books that I read, but you'll just have to wait and see. But anyway, now I must dash - Gotham season 2 is starting and I'm so excited.